OK, so it wasn't so much a "thump, thump" as it was a swishy, pulsing, watery noise - but it was a heartbeat nonetheless! I had my second doctors appointment today and we heard the biscuit's heart with the doppler radio thingy (not a very clinical person am I?). It was amazing - overwhelming - relieving.
It was relieving because (confession time) I have a major problem with faith, trust, and giving up control. While I know in my head and heart that I actually have very very little to do with the development of this baby (don't argue with me on this, you won't change my mind - I don't know anything about building a brain, liver, blood vessels, or toenails), I still worry myself to death over it. I have to constantly repeat to myself Jesus' words "And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to the span of your life?" to remind myself how silly it is to fret over things I cannot control. After hearing the heartbeat today, I thought "Thank you Lord" immediately followed by "I am so dumb"! I know it's not silly to be concerned about my baby, but it's dumb to work myself into the virtual panic like I did this morning! Ahhh...more words from the Lord "Why are you afraid, you of little faith?" Eventually I know I'll catch on.
4 comments:
We all worry...but be sure you are enjoying every moment for you will change constantly and so will biscuit!! Love you guys!
You'll worry all the time. I told Tiffany once that I couldn't wait until I had the baby because then I could stop worrying. She politely laughed in my face. Unfortunately, worry is one of the biggest parts of motherhood, and yet we are so fortunate to know we aren't in control. Scary, but relieving also. I can't wait to see the first biscuit pics - coming in August!
OH MY GOSH .. .. MELLY'S PREGNANT!!!!!!! How exciting!! I am just so incredibly happy for you guys! Yay! Now I get to follow YOU on this wonderful adventure. Enjoy every second, the good and the bad, because time will totally fly by. Like can you believe Jonas will be a year old in August? So keep the weekend of August 22 open b/c I expect you and Richard to be there :). JJ still believes he's made up ;) so you have to prove him wrong! Yay! Hugs!!
Oh, and it's totally like you said in your post, God is so in control. Just wait til you see the ultrasound photo, that's when it really hits...only God can create something so perfect. :)
Melanie!! So long!! Congrats on the new news!!
Love Bonney
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